High on Love

Have you ever found yourself in a crowded room, feeling an uncontrollable energy drawing you toward someone? That feeling, the rush of excitement and the flutter of butterflies in your stomach. I used to think that this intense attraction was purely magical, a serendipitous alignment of the stars. After a deep dive into the psychology of relationships, I've come to realise that the reasons behind attraction are far more intricate and often rooted in our early experiences.

Fascinating insights from the likes of Jung and Freud argue that we choose partners based on deeply ingrained composite of our primary caregivers from childhood. The individuals we depend on, and their behaviour, be it nurturing, distant, controlling, or even cruel, shaping our views on love and connection. When I reflect on past relationships, I see how previous choices often mirrored my emotional needs.  

The initial spark of chemistry, gives an intoxicating rush of neurochemicals; dopamine and phenylethylamine coursing through your veins, it feels like an altered state of consciousness. The first stage of love is filled with excitement, passion, and lust. It's euphoric and almost spiritual. 

The tumultuous times in a relationship can be deeply transformative if you're willing to do the work. Many relationships fail during challenging times because partners don’t recognise the significance. When you chose to navigate through the chaos, and find ways to communicate effectively, you will come to recognise true love requires conscious effort from both sides, moving beyond the chemical highs and emotional explosions. It's about true intimacy, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Learning to communicate needs openly and to supporting each other’s growth. 

Now, I understand that love isn’t just a feeling, it’s a conscious choice to support and connect with another person in a deeper way. 

My journey has not only transformed my understanding of relationships but has also blessed me with a more profound sense of self-awareness. I’m learning to take responsibility for my own happiness, which frees me to love more authentically.

Reflecting on past experiences, I’ve realised that the path to true intimacy is a beautiful, albeit challenging, journey. We all have the capacity to evolve and learn from our pasts, shaping our future relationships into ones filled with understanding, compassion, and genuine connection.